Thunder

Jungle blackness is my disguise whether I wear one or many is redemption of harrowing artistry and conceptual nudity; my name is nigger.

"Who wrote this book on this weird shelf?"

"....you're stoned."

"...he said I'm traumatized and acting..."

"I wrote it."

"When?"

".....when I got here and these people in the house sent it to some scientist and he made it a big deal......."

"It's kind of fucked up."

"...that's how it is here."

"Yeah it is..."

"Yeah..."

"It really is different to be black huh?"

"Yeah it is."

"......you look black like the way people think black looks."

"What do you mean?"

"...don't know just the hair and the eyes....and your lips....and you just got that look about you that reminds them of black culture. And you're kind of funny, like goofy, and people like that. But she doesn't understand....they got stuff stuck up their butts."

"Who are they?"

"You don't really see them or hear them. Anyways this is a dream. I will be back to shock when I sneak back in.......I don't want any part of what is going to happen.......what is that guy doing?"

"Taking a blood sample for Mr. Donkey."

"From you?"

"Yeah."

"!"

"Why?"

"Because he wants to prove something to somebody."

"It bubbles and does stuff."

"Yeah...."

"I knew it would do that when I first saw you."

"How?"

"You are the god damn healthiest person I ever fucking saw."

"What does that mean?"

"You're what the Chinese call a dragon's lion."

"....oh."

"Except you get feverish migraine headaches. You're fever right now rates at 200 degrees Fahrenheit....but your body temperature is 20 below zero to keep you in good health.....some reason none of this shit surprises me or any of us. So he wants me to show this to some asshole who thinks he's a big shot but really he just lost everything for being an asshole but this is a freebie by me. And it has nothing to do with you.....he fucked over a lot of people and he is wanting to know if there is something in your body that can save his life but your blood does not match anybody on the planet except for her.....what is your name dear?"

"I don't know."

"I know how that feels."

"Anyways.......there may be other people......possibly your neighbors although they seem to be well.....it does not match him at all. This blood cannot be handled by most people. Most of most people........it's just not really blood it's something else but whatever. I just say you are Type O Negative....for the books and for the record I am out of here."

"Bye."

"What is your name?"

"I don't know!"

"....."

"Okay....."

Amethyst, there is a child somewhere inside the forbidden palace of the enslavers, bring him to the village of Havana, you will need to carry him head above water, he is the color of blue mist water inside the coffee fields and he lays upon a black cot.

Narcissus, what are these popping simultaneous sounds?

Amethyst, machine guns.....

"Are you the panther woman?"

"Are you the panther child?"

"....they kidnapped me for ransom."

"Ransom to whom?"

"........some kind of spectacle for a ruler without digits and markers..."

"Are you getting coffee all over your face?"

"It tastes like chocolate.....how come?"

"Oh I lathered cocoa butter before I left."

Running always running is a continuous description I think of myself; hurdles, obstacles, declaration, vehement nonsense, magical people, illusive worlds, logical thinkers, knowers unknown, objective sound, light fusion, growing embryo. Curl of curls upon my shoulder whispering sorrowful lyrics for the precedent cubical, flesh comes undone, minds whirl winds. Counting gems floating streams we jump into a dip; neighbors catch a little man they name Permanence. I return to a hostess shadow; she knows me well. The umbilical cord attaches domains while I travel home again. Coffee drips receptacle vessels inside various office buildings; Cordelia and I dream Brooklyn to be our arrival yet we reside four blocks from a welcome sign. Faces we know smile morbidly for Gemini's mysterious resemblance to death and darkness. A moment's sadness is an eternal contemplation. Humble abodes chop off several toes; roll, hiss, spit, scream, sigh, nevermore. What grotesque words; the handbook for sharpened fangs and tools. Basement one, basement two; downstairs is a spiral into empty bourbon liquor crates stacking records Stan and I collect. Treasures are silent; mouths bring pain.

Narcissus, I dreamt of you wearing pink.

I shall for you if thus is all but a dream however I come to understand though lives much spent consist of pounds made of sterling remnants.........you are unto me a family even so my blood explores strange earth without me.

They think of you always my dear flower.

I am running out of shit to talk....

We have lines that Cordelia wrote.

Oh....

Anyways......it was a very earthen pink like none I ever saw. Your hair was gorgeous black and strong.....you were painting blue flowers....and there was a goat watching....not like goats we know but so furry and soft with the sharpest damn god damn horns.......there were so many cats I breathed a moan. They were cool though....with claws and pointy ears. There were children everywhere running around....one looked like me and you put together......he called you Aunt.

This script sucks.

I am tired of talking about kicking ass and being bitches.

This script really fucking sucks fucking ass and bitches.

....so what do you think about Miles Davis?

Was that what Obama did?

He made a bunch of jazzy type music.

Really?

He asked me to be a lady he called Billie.

What else?

.....something about a bus and terminating switches.

Did he choose a name for us to call him?

No....he said a little boy will name him.

So he is going to go through what we went through except inside a box.

.....I will be there.

............black president?

Whatever that means...

How intriguing indeed.

....he thinks it's boring but he's going to do it.

Wife and kids?

......anyways.....I doubt he will remember me.

Hhhhmmm.......what will he change?

Change.

Currency or chaos?

The same.

True....so damn true.

People will want to kill him.

And us too.

You dreamed I carried you??.....!

Yes....I fell from the sky! Quite a blast actually....the last thing I saw before hitting the ground was a damn egret of some sort....with three fucking heads....I barked at him and growled and I think it pissed him off so he sent be barreling down.....I came to lie there for so long it was hell on earth until I heard switching foot burps of stones and gravel.....and was lifted onto a very stern shoulder......walking for so long the earth was barren.....laying in a bed screaming for ugly walls and strange pictures....perhaps tackiness....perhaps just an image....it scared me some but you came running........wearing black from head to toe. I called you by name and you asked me what happened to my spores.......and what happened to my blue grin.....but you were being so cynically amusing holding a mirror to show me my face. And it was me. Before all this.....for we both suffer the entrapment of bliss.

..............I hope it comes true.

I do and do not. That place was fuck on earth!

.....I must of waited for you for so long.

You did or it felt as such until you let me go....and I let you go when I believed you could see and hear for the both of us........so many people died my friend.....so many people died in your arms and you were at their bed side.....they had all betrayed man in your blasphemy of false names yet nobody called you otherwise or fucked with it.....it was just a trick...........they were fooled by the folly and taking it out on us for so long I wondered if we would remain an upside down cross! Then you were surveying the kingdom for loss......death was coming quicker than your hand holding a baby cobra as he hid from your eyes for he knew you were her and he was so shy....he was so shy and woke inside a cage for prying eyes....when he escaped you were so quickly alarmed to see him inside a dangerous world. They tried to kill him you saw with your eyes and the fragrance of death upon your fingers he vomited so much you thought you had killed him! Worried for his intestines if he had any at all.....you spoke to him and assured him that forbidden forsakers would fall. He was so shy of you.....he cuddled your fingers and you soothed his scales....he dreamed of you but knew you were real.....you knew he was a cobra with his hood still an infant intermission. He was so god damn poisonous it wasn't even funny...as you walked people were dying just from it fuming from his skin! Nevertheless he was angry and reminded you of yourself vomiting greenery and food he shouldn't of ate. You wondered for injury while he wondered if he did the same....your worry grew into such sorrow for him.....for you had to give him to the wilderness and a dangerous land.....for there was an enemy waiting for him.....for there was where he must adapt and there is shade. There is where they abide....the people he shall know as neighbors and he cries to remind you of a small boy you rescued....or so you do not know it was such an act....he cries inside your heart.....to you a baby.....just a cute baby....so many people saw it on a televised broadcast they left to search him, cast him out, hurt him, shun him, watch him, some were worried and wanted to carry him but only you my dearest Amethyst could of done so thus was your bidding for you do not know even so when you remember the act of which shall be a strange dream in between for you do not know what you did but they do....six hundred and seven......although some are given words.....there are those who listen.....those given words must be martyrs....those who listen shall wait for you on a very strange mountain! He eats insects they bring him which he sees as quite normal however these insects are treacherous fighters and hard to destroy......you worried so much for his spinal cord if he had one at all......you felt him to be black.....people saw you walking playing a role I hid you as such a person for grey shadows.....you looked like a person walking and that is all however to you that is not enough and you rather not think of innocence any further for that is the prey of disgusting wishful predators.....you expected to die to be carried away by metal wrapped around your body....you expected the cage and shackles....eyes from windows cried for you and left you strange messages you desired to know....they drove by just to see it....the woman who holds the most poisonous snake in their world...then it happened that you absorbed his venom for he tapped you and exchanged a tickle of plasma quite on accident however you both are one. You held his venom and he held your tongue.

And where were you when all this happened?

Watching you from a blasted television fucking thing and Leonna and Zyna and Cordelia experiencing your emotion and your silence....and freaking out cause I knew something was after all of us however Loki informed me with a message....strange one at that of crude oil droplets and skeletal remains of horses.....so strange.....regardless the message was clear. We shall be here evermore and we will touch eternity with existence. That whatever was going on we were somewhat oblivious by choice however it was not about us and we were further excluded from people's animosity and nonsense yet chastised for our looks! How stupid indeed but as the donkey sent messages, GET OVER IT.

".....I'm a model. A supermodel."

"......okay.....so what is that?"

"A super hero that walks like a cat."

"....that's a better description than the job thing."

"What are you?"

"An asshole."

"....what about an ass?"

"Huh! I wish! Do you know anything about them?"

"They hop like bunnies and perk their ears."

"You had one?"

"A black one and a boar."

"You're crying again. You got to just deal with it."

"You are so compassionate."

"Ah get over it."

"I carried him for seventeen miles away from a fire sweeping through a hill village.....the donkey followed..."

"Then what?"

"I don't know I never saw them again."

"...they probably lived somewhere while that happened."

"There was a church that outlast while we tried our hardest to sand it off with bags."

".......then they were in the church."

"They said the people in the church all disappeared for when we found it all was gone even the seats....how strange."

"....then they are probably here. Didn't we talk about this before or maybe it was another one of those fucking scientific dreams."

".........they were my friends."

"Who else was in there?"

"Children and three elders."

"How many child things?"

"....child things! There were three hundred and eighty little people."

"Oh alright well get over it. They are fine and somewhere around this stupid fucking thing."

"You wanted to live here."

"You picked it too."

"....well....what is all this for?"

"You fucking puked everywhere again and you keep passing in and out and fucking shit up so the neighbors are broke from putting up a bill for your stupid butt."

"....shit."

"....."

"I owe them a lot."

"Nah they said forget about it but they said they want you to beat some scientist that lives here holding their tubes."

"What to do to him?"

"They want you to cut off his arms and then cut off his legs and keep him like that while he answers their questions."

"Where is he?"

"They know where he is but they got to take you there. I don't talk to him. I think he's a fucking retard."

"...."

"Well he is. If he is going to talk shit that don't make sense and get money for it then he just fucking sucks ass."

"......okay."

"You won't remember this."

"Will you?"

"Nope."

".....do you care about anything?"

"Donkeys."

"....okay."

"There's some kind of temple over that way. Maybe you should go see it while you are somewhat alive and hang out with it. That's what the neighbors told me to tell you."

"What are they like?"

"....who knows."

".....so what you are going to be some kind of role like a name?"

"It won't work for long. I don't care about it. Marsha fucked with the computer trying to fuck us both up and confuse everything.....but I don't think that will work either. She thinks she's smart and pretty or something but I figured out that was from crossed wires with you and people laugh at her for acting like that when you think you are sick and bleeding and full of impolite manners and bothersome but it's just something weird. Don't worry about the donkeys though I got their asses."

"....you're going to annoy me aren't you?"

"I'm programmed to do that and to do some routine shit."

"I've seen you before."

"I've seen you before too with some blonde guy I thought. He watches you from a distance...."

"Really? What was I doing?"

"Singing a song."

"What was it?"

"Something about flying away and not knowing where your flow is."

"What were you doing?"

"Burying a body."

"Is that your hobby?"

"....no it's my job."

"?"

".....anyways some guy gave me a Japanese sword or some shit like that. I got some fake story to tell about it but it's all rusty and metal and weird."

"What should I do about it?"

"He told me you would fix it."

"Then what?"

"Give it back to him."

"Who is he?"

"....some black guy who eats a lot of fish. He goes fishing or something and doesn't talk to anybody.....he said you would see him in a dream. He just wears t-shirts and jeans and walks a lot....whatever I don't care."

"....what do you do?"

"I am not sure I forgot."

"You look the same."

"So do you."

"What are those things?"

"Cats."

"Fucking hell."

"I don't like them either but they said if I am not nice to them they will zap me so I am going to exaggerate a whole hell of a lot so they don't zap me."

"...they look weird."

".....Marsha taught them to piss everywhere and scratch."

"She was really here?"

"Oh yeah saying it was her house and starting a riot to fuck with our heads."

"What happened?"

"She thought it was done to leave for you to deal with and us so she left this box thing to sit inside the thing she thinks is her house but we asked those robot kids to make it another world to fuck with her for fucking with us. They did it. She needs to get over it."

".....what did she do here?"

"Eat a lot of food, have sex with strangers."

"Great."

"She told people she was you but you look like that and she looks like a whale."

"......an insult to whales."

"Wow that was really mean."

"Are you serious?"

"I don't really get what you said but it sounded smart or some shit."

"Whales are gorgeous because of their gentle behavior."

"Oh I get it."

"No you don't."

"....they said I will do things without knowing."

"Great."

".......well.......I guess you are one of those environmental people."

".....I don't get it."

"A tree kissing person."

"I kiss trees?"

"...I don't know do you?"

"......I'm stuck here am I not?"

"....uh....."

"Nachiketa."

"Who is that?"

"A guy that died."

"Did you just call me his name?"

"It means 'tisk tisk'..."

"......how did he die?"

"He was burned to death."

"Why?"

"Why!"

"Yeah I asked you a question.....get over it."

"Because.....well I am not sure why. He ate stolen food, borrowed money never returned, he asked people for religious bearings, and he just......he was just......I don't know."

"Where does it come from?"

"Buddhist scripture."

".........no it's like Indian or something."

"Oh....Hindu?"

"It's the same?"

"Yeah one is in India and the other is in China."

"Oh."

"....okay so this is going to fucking suck really god damn hard."

"She does that a lot."

"Who?"

"Marsha? Is that her name?"

"Yeah Marsha."

"....god I hate her guts."

".....she doesn't care."

"She should cause if I ever see her again I am going to get her good."

"I used to feel the same."

"You should still feel the same."

"I just want her gone out of my body."

"I just want her gone."

"You will get your wish."

"Will you do it?"

"No."

"What will?"

"....do you really want to know?"

"Yes."

"....thunderstorms."

"What?"

"....swamps she will be lost looking for someone to find her but it will be another world she created with her heart while thunderstorms reach for her she will perish never to return as she was...."

"Maybe if she was....different."

"Like what?"

".....I don't know. Just completely different."

"....I understand."

"Yeah well you really are just like a snake."

"How?"

"You puke out your ass and twitch like them."

"Who was that guy again?"

"The guy that kissed you while you were all fucking thrashing and destroying everything?"

"Yes."

"....I told him you were Conan The Barbarian."

".....no you didn't...??"

"Why does it matter? You like him or something?"

"....why did you let him kiss me?"

"I'm not your parent. I don't give a shit."

".....okay good because I really don't mind anymore."

"You're so weird."

"Did....oh."

"....aren't you married with like a thousand kids?"

"There's that many?"

"....you're so weird."

"You're funny."

"How so?"

"Ask a doctor."

"...I will."

"I told you Doc."

"He can't answer."

"...."

"He's rolling around crying and that sound is like thunder."